School Shopping with Daddy

This is me waiting in the car while Daddy picked up a few things for the new school year. I can't wait to visit his classroom...all the kids love me.

Go Ducks!

I've been practicing my duck quack sounds a lot lately.

I think I'm going to be a Duck even though my parents didn't go to the Duck school or the Beaver school. I guess someone in this family will have to be decisive, so it might as well be the 3-month-old.

x-games

While it won't take me long to become a better skateboarder than Daddy, I think my real skills lie in the mastery of the newest extreme sport... the scooter. As you can see, I defy all laws of physics.

(but I have a feeling that in order to convince you, Daddy will need to photoshop out Grandpa Pop-Pop)

I can't hear you when I'm sleeping...

My Grandma Betty (we still haven't agreed on your nickname yet), tells the greatest stories. She has lots of energy and even uses a lot of voices like my Daddy.

Sometimes her stories make me sleepy though, and I'm sorry Grandma, but I can't hear the stories when I'm sleeping.

Phelps Schmelps!

Everyone makes such a big deal out of Michael Phelps and his body proportions. At 6'4" he has the legs of a 6' man and the torso of a 6'10" man or something like that. That's nothing! I have the legs of a 2'8" man and the torso of a 3'5" man. Now that's something to get excited about.

Not to mention the sheer speed in which I can kick my legs and flap my arms... look it's so fast that it can't even be photographed!



(BTW-My Dad threw the towel over my "swimsuit area" to abide with Blogger's nudity policy. As you can see I'm a little nervous about getting busted.)

child prodigy

My parents were both getting so excited when I started pressing down the keys on Daddy's Rhodes. They started going on about a child prodigy and how this may be the way they'll finally pay off their student loans. I feel bad telling them that I was just trying to find what appeared to be a lost Cheerio.

We have ways of finding the truth...

Alright Mr. Lavender you can play the silent game, but we have ways of finding the truth. If you don't tell me who took my binky, you'll be sorry!

(I think that my parents' watch too much Alias on DVD. It may be causing some ill side effects, as I have never interrogated any of my toys before)

Football Baby

I'm starting to think that I'm becoming a football. Whenever I go somewhere with Mommy and Daddy, I get passed around from person to person like I'm a baton. Sadly, in the United States, batons get dropped with an alarming frequency, so I'd rather think of myself as a football. Besides the fact that it's clearly my Daddy's favorite sport, I like footballs, because the players are taught to cradle the football close to their bodies and maintain "5 points of contact" (Dad hasn't explained that one yet). I like the thought of being cradled and highly valued as I'm passed around, since we in the USA seem to value footballs more than batons.

I went to school with Daddy and spent most of my time being passed around from one stranger to another. I remember Annie and Angie, my Daddy's co-workers pretty well. Mainly, I know Annie best because she visited me in the hospital and never lets me go when she holds me. Some other strangers carried me around and I had to do so much smiling and giggling that I ended up so tired that I fell asleep in Daddy's class (He told me not to worry because I wasn't the first one to do this).

My First Wedding!

Lucky me! Tonight I made it to my first wedding. Daddy's friend and band mate Jon Jones was getting hitched (this is what my Daddy said, but they never hooked him up to a cart or horse).

From what I can tell, a wedding is where two pretty people are surrounded by a bunch of other pretty people, all of whom have very nice (and very hot with all of the men wearing black in the late summer) clothes on. They stand around for awhile and smile a lot while another man talks for too long to all of the less pretty people in the crowd (my Daddy yawned a few times). I think that this man tells everyone a sad story, or maybe it's about something sad that happened to a mommy, because all of the mommies (even my Mommy) started crying. Or maybe the mommies were crying because of all of the yawning that the daddies were doing (It's hard for me to tell because I'm still a baby).

The wedding seemed pretty fancy to me. It was at the Portland Art Museum where there are a bunch of very pale, very naked, and very still people that stand around all of the time. I don't think they ever moved the entire time we were there. There was even one of these still, pale ladies who was missing both of her arms.

I had a good time and I even got to dress up in some new brown overalls. My Daddy and I both wore yellow shirts and brown outfits. We all looked so cool that we decided to take this picture:

since some of you have asked...

Several of you out there in cyber-nets have been wondering what I have been doing. More importantly why have I not posted recently? I wish I had a good reason (more than my usual need to focus on the extremely important developmental stages that I not only reach, but smash to pieces), but I really don't.

It's not for lack of blog-worthy material for, rest assured, I do something completely adorable and earth-shatteringly cute every single day. Never fear, I'll catch the blog back up and let you know what I've been up to, but for the most part, I've just been having a really good time hanging out with my Mommy and Daddy as the picture below seems to indicate.

look into my eyes

As you gaze into my eyes, you will find yourself feeling very sleepy. You will slowly release the tension in your shoulders and feel it work its way down your back leaving you very calm and relaxed. You will then get up and get me an oatmeal cookie. You will not question whether-or-not it is too soon for me to have cookies, you will simply hand me the cookie and feel good about it. After I have finished eating the cookie, I will count down backwards from 10 and you will find yourself feeling rested and not at all curious about the cookie crumbs on my striped onezie.

command center

So I must be gaining in importance because I now get to sit at the controls of what seems to be a very important console. I believe I'm either commanding some kind of missile defense system or perhaps I'm keeping a nuclear power plant from entering meltdown. Whatever the case I feel pretty important and I'm starting to get the hang of everything. See the ease and finesse with which I push this button?

Now if only I knew what this yellow thing did...

Hello Morning!

If I ever play in a band like my Daddy I think Hello Morning would be an awesome name, but in this case it simply describes how I feel each day.

This is me literally seconds after waking up. I greet each day with a long series of smiles and wonder what is in store. How could I not be happy at the sight of another shiny day (and I think even though I have yet to experience one, that I'll like the cloudy ones too)?

I think that most adults could learn a lot from me about how to start your day. Maybe I could teach some lessons...

D.E.A.R.!

Apparently there are these stories that are typed up and printed on paper called books. My Mommy and Daddy read these fat ones with tiny pages with the names of famous people on them. My books are short and skinny with really fat pages and characters with funny voices. My Daddy makes all of the voices and I'm still undecided on whether he likes to make them more, or I like to hear them more, but we both have fun.

When it gets into the middle of the afternoon, Daddy shouts to "Drop Everything And Read!" and that's when the books come out. So far, my favorite is Barnyard Animals. Each time it gets to the part with the donkey, I'm surprised (and a little startled) by the sound he makes. My books are a lot of fun, but there's one on the coffee table about an Obama that looks rather interesting...

awww yeah!

Remember that post a couple of posts ago about the ladies?

Well apparently it's already happening!

hello? anyone home?

Um, I'm not sure where my parents went...

They just left me on the bed.

I really hope they're coming back sometime soon!

this one's for the ladies!

I thought I'd lean into the camera and whisper to my female readers that in 2026 (or sooner depending on how prude my parents end up being) I'll be totally available.

As you can see I have a great smile, I'm well dressed, and I am a great listener (I rarely talk over you... or even talk at all). So save the date, because I'm sure that demand will be high!

And for those of you that prefer the coy approach, a can also do aloof.

3 pack

My Daddy is notorious for telling lots of jokes. They fall into three categories:

1) so bad that they're puzzling and require explanation.



2) funny enough to merit a giggle.



3) knee slappingly hilarious!

I believe I can touch the sky

While this may look like a baby in the middle of a terrible temper tantrum, it is not. I believe that I can fly. I've seen the birds do it, from time to time the squirrels in the back yard do it, so I figure why not me? I admit that I have yet to get off the ground, and you can see the frustration in my face, but I won't stop trying.

hand model

My parents think that I'm fascinated with my hands. While this is an appropriate developmental stage for my age they are so wrong. They don't know that I've devised this way to tell time using my wrist as a sundial. So when Daddy is kissing me repeatedly with his gross beard, I'm looking at my wrist and timing things to see how soon it will end. Here I am using this method to figure out if I have time to play with Kazu.

Brett Favre

With all of this media over-coverage on the will-he-play? won't-he-play? with-whom-will-he-play? Brett Favre debate, I thought that I'd weigh in and give my take on the debate...



Maybe my Daddy will stop taking about it now! ;-)

Compu-Boy

Since I do all of this blogging, I thought I'd share a picture of myself basking in the glow of my computer screen. Look at how the rectangular screen reflects in my eyes! As you can tell, the warm light lulls me into a slight state of hypnosis. Somehow in the midst of this altered state of mind, I'm able to post these blogs.

first concert

It took long enough, but I've finally been to my first concert! With my musical family, I figured that it would have taken less than two months to get out to see some live music, but better late than never I suppose. So Mommy and Grandma D (Daddy was still in the rack because of his sinus infection) took me to see Brooklyn's own Hasidic Reggae star Matisyahu. I'm no critic and mind you this was my first and only concert, but it was... okay (I think I'm already becoming hard to please).

lunch date

We had lunch out as a family today (which Daddy explained is a rare occurrence). We went to Bob's Red Mill for both a veggie (Mommy) and veggie supreme (Daddy) sandwich, both of which looked so good that I wanted to get a closer look. Daddy put the plate on top of me and I really think that once I can eat solid foods I'd like to try pickles. That one in front of me looks fairly tasty.

"Gah-goo blag-bap?"

Clearly, I don't know the answer, and while you'd think that the title of this post is me speaking baby talk, it was actually Daddy asking me a question. He's kinda weird. Which has me making this expression a lot: